Day 005. Breaking the Scroll: 91 Days Off Social Media & Rediscovering Life IRL
The Daily Chronicles of a Millennial on a Social Media Detox
📢❗🚨 Day 005 of this special series in October. 📢❗🚨
If you’re new here, welcome! I am spending October on a daily series chronicling my eighth round on an Instagram sabbatical. I’ve welcomed this annual ritual since 2016, but this year is the first time I am documenting my daily observations and sharing them with you, my lovely readers.
Thank you for spending some of your day with me. You can subscribe to follow along and receive these directly to your inbox. But if your inboxes feels under siege, you can tweak your settings here.
Otherwise, stay tuned—for a little while—to see what I’ll create. You can read Day 001, 002, 003, 004 to get up to speed.
I spent last week mesmerised at the frequency of my attempted visits to Instagram. I caught myself trying to open the app a lot less over the weekend, but a week into my sabbatical, the habit is still very much alive.
It’s of course not at all surprising if I were still logged on. Instagram is part of billions of peoples daily rituals. But what continues to unsettle me, each year, is how the first week of this welcomed sabbatical is always greeted with surprised disappointments of facing the login screen.
Like an addict experiencing withdrawals, the difference is as a drug addict I would need money and to go out of my way to find my fix. With Instagram, the visits are automatic, and the doses are free and readily available at the touch of a few buttons on my personal smartphone.
One evening, in 2016, after what I recall as a pleasant day, I returned home, expecting to relax in the cozy comforts of my bed, to instead find myself unexpectedly rattled.
What would’ve otherwise been a peaceful night, turned sour at an instant when my serenity was interrupted by a post of my ex, on a beach holiday, with his new girlfriend—and his mom.
In a normal scenario, if I were to bump into the happy couple (and his mom) on the streets, I could run off in the other direction. I may be left to ruminate on my feelings. But I can also call a trusted friend, to vent my frustrations or seek comfort from. I can even choose to watch discreetly, if I so please, at a safe distance. But, would then be left to reflect on my thoughts, as the joyful trio disappeared from my line of sight.
It’s normal to react to an ex with his new beaux. It’s not surprising to get a rush of emotions stirring. A reaction is expected. That’s human.
But, what’s not normal is how as we are caught off guard by our emotionally charged reactions, we also find ourselves having to confront the flood of other moments that we otherwise wouldn’t have access to without Instagram.
I was naturally curious to find myself scrolling through my ex’s recent history.
Even finding my way on his new girlfriend’s account too. Without warning I abruptly spiralled into unproductive minutes of snooping—witnessing the rolodex of greatest hits, of their newly found love, which I otherwise wouldn’t have access to.
This is how Instagram can, without warning, suck our time and attention away. Don’t mind the fact that I hadn’t thought about my ex for a while. Instagram can all of a sudden, intrude in an unpleasant way and eat away at one of our most precious nonrenewable resources, without consent—our time.
If this was in real life, the social deterrent to behave like a normal person— to look away, walk away, and get on with my day— would’ve been enough to help manage my behaviour.
But on Instagram, conveniently from the comforts of my home, I am left isolated and alone to entertain all the imaginary scenarios sprouting in my mind. How could he have moved on so fast? Who is this new girl? Where did they meet? Our breakup was as fresh as this morning’s toast.
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I knew, at that moment, I needed to get off Instagram ASAP!
Admittedly, I am grateful for that moment back in 2016. Sometimes difficult moments are ripe to teach us valuable lessons. That moment was when I decided to do something about my Instagram use. It’s also when I started to think deeper about the role Instagram and other apps had in my day.
But, that’s the thing with Instagram, it doesn’t tell you what it’s about to serve you. There’s no warning whether what you’ll see will be well received. There’s neither any real scrutiny over whether what I am seeing is accurate or a bunch of misinformation.
It’s all a random jumble of information circling the web, served by an even more mysterious algorithm, that’s controlled by AI and a team of engineers at a cosy distance from their offices in Silicon Valley (or maybe even from some remote paradise island).
Do you think these people are equipped to deeply think about the repercussions of their decisions? Would they have the bandwidth to concern themselves with the ethics of what they're designing? Especially if attracting more time and attention equals greater bonuses on their paycheques? Are they even aware that their decisions are impacting the future of humanity?
Honestly, I don’t blame them, they’re probably just ticking boxes to complete a list of KPIs and trying to make a living.
I believe the root of the problem is much more complex than anything a single person, company or entity can truly solve.
Despite this reality, billions of us give our undivided and complete trust to it, and, for that matter, all other apps participating in the attention economy. We diligently visit everyday, trusting what it will serve us. We don’t second guess it, we willingly participate in its mysterious dealings.
Remember when Instagram first decided timely content isn’t as favourable to highly engaged content? What about when they first introduced posts from accounts you don’t follow? And what about the additional advertising that’s now also sandwiched in your feed?
All of these minor changes accumulate and are executed at their own discretion, rolled out to billions of people worldwide. Like a server at Subway who decides to go rogue and put everything—including the red onions and pickles—without bothering to ask, we are the passive recipients, on the other side, blindly accepting bad breath and sour aftertastes—no questions asked.
Even if our sense of comparison and FOMO (fear of missing out) is heightened, we continue to participate. The benefits outweigh the negatives right? Instagram only serves us things we care about, doesn’t it? We’re the ones choosing aren’t we?
We’re at the mercy of the algorithm; it’s part of the mystery, the hook, and the ‘fun’. We don’t even know what order of content each day will bring. But isn’t all of what Instagram is, a free advertising bulletin?
Whether it’s paid ads or non paid ads, even those friends who aren’t professional ‘influencers’ are influencing you on some level; convincing you to buy, try, and look into something you didn’t know you needed.
Instagram is the holy grail of advertising, cleverly disguised as a social platform with an endless stream of entertainment. Since the basic premise to any advertising is to convince you that you’re missing their product or service, Instagram inadvertently is the perfect machine to constantly reinforce the message that you are never enough—without the endless library of things and places you’re supposedly lacking.
Ironically, it’s also a behemoth that we’ve welcomed everyday, for more than a decade, for hours on end. With open arms we willingly share our most intimate information, and generously donate our time and attention.
As I write this series to explore my dilemma, I am left perplexed at how to move forward. On one hand, I feel I benefit from the platform—especially in regards to discovering new things, seeking inspiration, entertainment, promoting my ventures, and keeping in touch with friends; but it’s also getting increasingly difficult to ignore what I am giving up as well.
What do you think about all of this? How do you manage your relationship with Instagram? Do you proactively manage your usage?
Leave a message or a comment in the area below, I’d really like know what you think.
Follow along…
Day 004. Breaking the Scroll: 91 Days Off Social Media & Rediscovering Life IRL
📢❗🚨 Day 004 of this special series in October. 📢❗🚨
This series feels like a public service announcement (PSA)—ideas I want everyone to be able to access. I’ve made it accessible and public for everyone to read.
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Thank you for spending some of your day with me.